Back At It

*DISCLAIMER: This is my first entry via DroidX so I don't know what the formatting will look like.*

Well it has been quite a while since I last blogged. I've had plenty to say, but haven't felt like saying it.

I find that I am currently in quite an uncomfortable place...that place beyond complacency but just short of Godly contentment. *sighs* Press toward the mark, right.

I'm convinced that I am not the only person to feel like they are floating between being in control (so we think) and trusting God. I think that place exists and many of us live in it. Unfortunately.

Now, I must admit that though this place can feel so overwhelming, I am learning. God's promises wont let me go back so I must look in the mirror and remind myself to trust Him.

No, it is not easy, but just like Jacob, I know it is worth the fight.

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Preparation

Well, I haven't had a moment of overwhelming emotion like I did tonight in a LONG time! It was enough to lead me to once again blog. Wow! For those of you who follow me on Twitter (@TeyaSophia), you may have seen a tweet that stated: "When you ask God for clarification, be ready for what you see." A friend reminded me that this statement is similar to "If you can't handle the answer, don't ask the question." Well, I asked...so now I must deal with the response.

Here are my thoughts for tonight...they are actually meant more to encourage myself than the reader. However, if someone reads this and relates or receives, then I'm grateful for that bonus.

I am blessed. Every moment before this one has brought me to this one and leads me to the next. As we mature, we learn more and more about ourselves - what we want, our strengths, our weaknesses. What we do with this information is crucial! As we mature in our spiritual lives, our relationship with Christ, growth in ministry (no matter how "big" or "small"), then we must admit we find ourselves in circumstances that transcend logic, transcend our human understanding, transcend expectations. I am in that moment. A while ago I began accepting greater responsibility for my personal progression ...within the will of God. Now with that comes accountability. When we take hold of the reigns and charge forward in this Christian way, we have to suit up.

Recently, I have felt a certain way about specific aspects of my life, like big changes were about to happen. I'm sure many of us are in that place...the place where we feel God is about to release some things we've been waiting for. In this moment we get excited about what is to come...but today I was reminded that perhaps there are somethings that we still have to get rid of, or learn, before that big change.

Have you ever prayed, asking God to help you understand a thought, or to point you in a direction, or to clear away the things, people, etc. that are not a necessity? I have been praying that prayer. Well, God knew my spirit meant it, but boy my poor little heart (or was it just my logical mind) would struggle with the outcome. However, I am so far beyond grateful for the amazing people (blessings to me so unexpectantly) who know just what to say and how to say it. A dear sweetheart told me (paraphrased for my protection...lol) that although it may be hard to see, God has something greater in store for me and needed to clear away some things so I'd be fully available for what He is preparing. I'm still tearing up when I read that text.

Ecclessiates says there are times appointed for certain things. When in the moment, be in the moment, then move beyond the moment. We must not become paralyzed by the disappointments and unexpectancies that disrupt our path; instead, we must pull up over those things that could deceive us into taking a detour from the narrow path. Hold fast to the promises God has made to us. When we seek to fulfill the will of God, we can't give up on that determination because we don't see the path to that expected end, we can't fit the promise into our logic.

Jeremiah 29:11-13 "For I know the thoughts that I think towards you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart."


~Me

Nothing Beats a Failure But a Try

I am a new fan of Bengals’ wide-receiver Chad Ochocinco. Currently, he is a contestant on ABC’s Dancing With The Stars. Watching his performances, reading his tweets, and viewing his Ustream videos have helped me realize something. No matter who you are, we all desire to please, to be viewed as successful. We seek approval and validation. One of my nieces brought me to tears a few weeks ago because of that same mentality. She was faced with a challenge that felt so overwhelming for her that she cried for hours. She felt it was too much to overcome and was hurt that her potential failure would cause disappointment for others she sought to please.

We do this all the time. Some of us are more aware of it than others, but let’s be honest: we all seek approval. We dress a certain way, or not, to either elicit approval or openly rebel because we fear NOT getting that approval. Where does this deeply-rooted, subconsciously strong desire come from? I don’t know. LOL. We are taught morals and standards; good vs. bad; right and wrong; success or failure, continuously. Then taught to be yourself, live your life for you not others, quit trying to please everyone. Then tomorrow people are being told they’re selfish or too giving/walked over; told they work too hard or not hard enough; told they’re operating beneath their gifts or not called/qualified to operate in some way…the list of contradictions could continue forever.

It is easy to say to another: God is the only one whose approval matters. However, we are in this world, dwelling among those we love and desire to see happy. We are not emotionless beings. Feelings are a natural, God-designed characteristic. The catch is reconciling the spiritual purpose to our emotional needs. FACT: Left to our own choices, we will ultimately fail. It is only through submission to Christ and the leadership of the Holy Spirit that we will achieve true, immeasurable, unfaltering success.

Now achievement of that success is not always easy. Recently, I was reminded that I hinder my successes because I am working the plan according to MY logic. Duh, chick, you’re smart but not THAT smart. Trusting that I don’t know what is best for me is tough. We are encouraged to be independent, self-sufficient, trust no man (human). Well, God is no man (human). Trust Him. He is Abba Father. Master Creator. Who knows better the purpose of a thing than the One who created it. I’m just saying…..

Let’s be real, we can’t possibly expect to forget what others think between today and tomorrow. Adjusting our focus to ensure God and His will for us is in the center of our focus is a moment to moment conscious decision. 3 John 1:2 says “Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.” KJV. I believe our temporal wealth and health are tied to our spiritual wealth and health. Let us prioritize. I know it can be hard, but if it was easy anyone could do it, thus no need for the “chosen”. See Matthew 20:16 and 1 Peter 2:9.

Press on my loves. You will disappoint and be disappointed, but nothing beats a failure but a try. *wink* Why not give Jesus a try? What’s the worse that could happen? If it doesn’t succeed and you didn’t interfere with the plan, blame it on Christ—I’m sure He’s already worked it all out anyway. XOXO

Variety...the spice of life (so I've heard)

Wow...it has really been a minute since I've posted a blog. You missed me??? LOL. Well, I'm back and I'm not sure what all will get typed during these wee hours of the night (when I should be sleeping), but I'm going for it anyway...

I love having intelligent, insightful conversations...even if all parties do not agree. Business classes teach about brainstorming and round table discussions for idea development. They are on to something. We are all molded by genetics, environment, experiences, etc. No two individuals are exactly the same. Our understanding is directly influenced by nature and nurture. These principles make discussion so empowering...if we allow it.

Fact: All of us are human, thus none of us perfect. Valuing the ideals and opinions of others is a staple to great wisdom. The ability to truly hear from others, digest (and dissect and explore) various data, and incorporate knowledge into life are learned traits. We think we have it all together. Honey, you know nothing...you only believe you know what you believe to be knowledge. Everything we believe we know is based on some primal degree of faith...faith that the source of that knowledge we believe we have is a reliable, valid source.

I support the sharing of information. Sure, some may say that certain ideas are so wrong and shouldn't even be entertained. Well, I say how do you know until you know what that idea is. A former co-worker once made the comment that she listens to rap and stays informed regarding rap artists so she has the knowledge to speak to youth about the things they should or shouldn't listen to. How can I blindly say "Don't listen to XYZ cause they are a bad influence" when I have never heard the lyrics of their music. The same goes with relationship with Christ.

The Word of God says every man is responsible for their own soul's salvation. I can't save you. I can't convert you into Sabbath observance. I can't judge you into heaven or the soon coming Kingdom of God. None of these things is within my power. However, what I can do is understand why I do as I do and believe as I believe. What I can do is gain an understanding of why another does or believes as they do. One man plants the seed, another plows, another gains the increase. It is our duty to share information and gain information. Fact: The Bible says iron sharpens iron.

In a previous discussion with a loved one, the statement was made that exposure equals responsibility. Once I receive knowledge, I am responsible for what I do with it...in my life and in imparting it in the lives of others.

What is your variety? Do you have variety? Do you fear variety? Grow...expand your garden.

#tisall....fornow
Me 

Opportunity

Okay…which thought will I share this time??? Well, let’s dish about missing the point. Let’s dish about missing opportunities. Let’s dish about misguided focus. You know, in this life we must continuously review our motives, our desires, the purpose of our efforts because it is oh so easy to be sidetracked from God’s true purpose for us and our daily actions. How often have I missed the opportunity to accomplish something great in a real, tangible moment because I’m focused on accomplishing something great in a future moment? This has probably happened more times than I realize. I want more. I’m sure many of us have shared this thought, this feeling. My question is this: Are we missing moments to be more, have more, do more,

TODAY because we are blindly striving for TOMORROW?

 

Now, I am a strong advocate for setting goals and dreams…and working hard to achieve them. However, I would like to become more sensitive to the moment I am currently in, as well. The Bible gives us many references to support the principle of taking advantage of the moments and opportunities before us RIGHT NOW. Do we realize that how we handle this moment, directly affects the next moment? Would you believe that if we glaze over today, we miss crucial preparation for tomorrow, thus risking tomorrow ever happening?

 

Let me further expound on my thoughts. Matthew 25:21 explains how we must first take care of that which we are given charge over TODAY in order to be found capable of more on TOMORROW. If I drive a 25 year old car, but I don’t wash it, don’t change the oil, drive it hard and reckless, just totally care nothing about the vehicle, then what proof do I have that I would treat a 2011 model any better? If I’m lazy on my job, half doing my work because it’s not the job I want…why would my supervisor entrust me with more responsibility, a promotion, the job I really want? Duh….

 

I mean really…I spend my days frustrated over what I haven’t achieved or the plans that I am diligently working on but see no fruit bearing…well, what am I doing regarding those things I have a measure of control over, those things I have already attained? Jeremiah 29:11 clearly describes how God already has a plan laid out for us. Matthew 25 tells us to not worry about tomorrow and how things will work out then. I think it is up to us to see it through. Why are we so busy tripping and over doing it for tomorrow when the moments of today are neglected and suffering? If a lady was pregnant with her second child, would she really spend all her time and money on the unborn baby yet totally neglect the child she already has? No, she nurtures and reassures and cares for the child she already has as she does the same for the child on the way. Perhaps she realizes that: 1) the new child is no more important or valuable than the first and 2) the lessons I learn with the first child increase my preparedness for the second.

 

Let us think of our lives this way. As we strive to make more of our lives, do more with our lives, let us not neglect the lives we currently have. In those consuming moments of frustration over what we aim to attain, let us not overlook, neglect a prime opportunity to succeed in THIS moment. Let us not miss this moment, these opportunities because we are so invested in the moments and opportunities of the future. I am learning that when I fully invest, commit, in this moment, take full advantage of today; then I am, in essence, better prepared for what is destined for my tomorrow.
 

Much love….

 

Why?????

“My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of the God, I will also forget thy children.” Hosea 4:6

How many times have we heard the phrase “because I said so”? How many times have we found ourselves participating in an act without having first-hand knowledge of the reason WHY? How many times have we repeated or referenced something we heard (scripture, quote, statement, whatever) without knowing the origin? Far too often we are judged or thought of as disrespectful for asking “Why?” or “How do you know?” Wow…how contrary that could be to the Word of God. True, some things come from shear faith….but for those things that do not…..

Hosea 4:6 tells us that without knowledge, we are destroyed. I’ve enjoyed a few conversations on this topic and I have concluded that knowledge is power---but only if one also has the understanding to use the knowledge properly. A teenage knows that when you turn the key in the car’s ignition, move the steering wheel and press the pedals in the floor: the vehicle moves. That is knowledge. Until that teenager gains an understanding of how to effectively operate the vehicle, effectively utilize the knowledge they have, they cannot legally operate the vehicle.

When I think about all of us who have “been in the church” so long, I wonder how may of us have “knowledge” without understanding. The best way to accomplish something, consistently, is to truly understand the “WHY”. Every government law, office policy, class rule, etc. was established for a reason. In my opinion, once we understand the reason, the source, we are more likely to apply it without hesitation. The same applies to the spiritual life.

Take the time to reflect on your normal practices, habits, beliefs. WHY do you go to church on Saturday/Sunday? WHY shouldn’t you have sex with someone who isn’t your legal spouse? WHY do/don’t you exchange Christmas gifts? If your answer is “because someone said so” or “that’s how it’s always been” then I do believe you’re lacking understanding. I fall into the same category.

Perhaps if we understand why we do what we do, we are more content doing it and less likely to turn away.

A Helping Hand

I am sure we all are aware of opportunities to help another. Every day one can turn on a television, listen to the radio, look around our environment and see NEED. As a Christian, we are taught love, compassion for others; but how many of us understand that love and compassion are not simple feelings. Love, compassion requires works, action to truly be effective.

I vividly recall two small acts of kindness shown by friends. Once I was in a public park and the friend I was with had a bag with an extra Chick-Fil-A sandwich, and without provocation, handed the bag to a guy (who appeared homeless) in the park. Another time, I was with a friend and as we approached a traffic light he began reaching for loose change. I added a couple dollars to the couple he had, and he passed it all to a guy standing (with the familiar cardboard sign) in the median.

I know we can be untrusting and judgemental of those who are without, but one thing both my friends had in common was that it didn't really matter if the guy threw the sandwich away or dude blew the money on drugs or alcohol. What mattered was they showed love and compassion.

How many small acts of kindness do we overlook daily because we are too busy taking care of ourselves? Moments pass when we could show love or compassion without cost. Missionaries are more than the elderly ladies dressed in white with big church hats, more than the group traveling to Third World countries. Missionaries are you and me. The Word of God teaches us to go and share His love, to speak of His greatness, to love one another as He loves us. Difficult it may be because, honestly, it may go against our human nature, BUT whom He has made stewards, He requires to be good and faithful stewards.

True, prayer changes things -- but faith without the action is fruitless. Therefore, while we pray, let us not be afraid or hesitant to mentor the youth that the system says is hopeless; serve a plate of food to the person with dingy clothes and dirty hands; offer a sincere compliment to the arrogant or mean co-worker. I am guilty of having desire without action. Join me on a journey to change that, to positively influence somone, to take a step out of our world to help another in theirs.

Live blessed!
Me

Spoiled

So it's Sabbath morning (yes, I'm a Sabbath Keeper...observer of the 4th Commandment...up in corporate worship every Friday night and Saturday morning) and I'm lying in my bed, listening to recordings of past services, typing a blog. So in SC (that's where I reside) we don't experience much snow; however, ice usually shuts the day down once or twice a year. Today is one of those days. My pastor says "God gives us common sense." So no one is driving into the rural community where my church is located and risking danger on the icy road. I haven't left my house (alarm still armed), so I have no idea what it looks like outside my door.

Well, here's my first "blog-blog".

I'm spoiled. Always have been. That's just the way it is. I don't take advantage of that fact. I am not greedy, don't think I'm selfish, believe I give as much as I expect. I don't ask for much, but what I do ask for I expect to get...and usually do. I am also independent so before I ask, I'll try it myself. I know that seems a bit pointless to you, but ride with me...I'm going somewhere.

I'm so used to being spoiled by family and friends, that I expect the same from God. I figured what ever gift I wanted, whatever blessing I wanted, whenever I wanted to be "anointed" or "used" then God would do just that. Oh how foolish and narrow that thinking was. But God. Now don't get your undies in a wad...yes, to an extent some of that is valid: I should expect God to spoil me, but that does not come without something on my part.

I was super blessed as a child because I was well behaved and did very well in school. I was a "good" daughter, so I could ask and receive. In addition, I was surrounded by super doper loving people. I must be viewed by God in a like manner in order to be spoiled by Him. I can no longer expect God to bless my voice, bless my finances, bless me with a mate (keeping it real), etc., if I am not a "good" daughter. Far too often we think we can be good to God on Sabbath, or Sunday, and just because I show up to service I have done my reasonable service and thus deserve to have my desires met. Oh foolishness. We can no longer expect to get something for nothing. My God has so much in store for us, so much required of us. Really, look around your life...you are crazy blessed right now. Trust me when I say, you CANNOT imagine the places the Father will take you if we spoiled Him. God is a jealous God; He wants NOTHING to come before Him (see Ten Commandments in Exodus 20). So why do we put things before Him, especially ourselves. Even I can't come before Christ. My wants, my desires do not supercede His. He knows so much better than I do.

So, my goal is to be unimaginably spoiled by Christ. To achieve this, I must totally, unselfishly spoil Him.

Trying Something New

So after reading the great posts on a couple blogs a few ladies I totally respect and admire, I have decided to try my hand at. Basically, this will be my random thoughts...things that cross my mind.

You know, sometimes, one just wants to share thoughts. Sometimes, one doesn't want their problems fixed, don't want a solution, but justs wants to share a thought or two. Perhaps my thoughts will provoke yours. Perhaps my thoughts will reflect yours. Perhaps my thoughts will just be thoughts.

Whatever my thoughts are, I can promise they will be positive and never bashing. Don't get it twisted: my opinion may not be yours, but there will always be some type of life encouraging point left with each reader. It is your choice if you notice it or not.

Soon, I'll return to update my profile with tidbits about me, but what does that really matter? I'm not writing to get you to know me, but to provoke your thoughts, reflect your thoughts, or simply present a new thought.

This blog may be the start of something new...contemplating one with my dear "Nae-Nae" focusing on being single, saved and patient! LOL! We'll see.

So subscribe and see what I have to say.

Me